CRITIQUE SUMMARY — Wk 5 mixed group critique

 Mike

• Narrative really strong, both cyborg-witch layers...textures are coming through. The speaking of the comment/poem is setting it up really well.
• Didn't feel inclined to read the 'script' out, didn't realise that was the aim. How could you encourage this, invite that sense of performance and play?  
• Representing intersections — reads queerness into the setup, not any references to Chinese culture. 
  
  Is this a space personal to you, that you want other people to experience?  
• Yes, partly but also I want build a process of cyborg-witch becoming so that the audience feels more open to exploring/occupying different possibilities of their own body/identity, whatever that might look like for them.
• Thinks I'm on the right track!

Jacqueline Gothe

• Might be a problem with bandwith? Device memory? — Not working, or is really slow to work on other people's computers. 
• The webcam, seeing yourself there is really exciting, a motion capture based interaction on top of that would be very cool
• Setup is working, communicating really well. The cyborg-witch materiality is definitely coming across. The play on words e.g. 'parse'/pass is super effective
• Conceptually strong, keep it that way so that it contextualises the experiments seamlessly. 
• Visually it is working, especially if you get the live feed to work. In terms of the stage setup, there's a bit of confusion. The imagery is in the right space content-wise, but it seems unresolved — the weird cutoffs at the corners, transparency of the shrine, the legibility of the ouija board etc.? Could be intentional but make sure it's your choice, not just throwaway details. Could play with the clarity and not-clarity of the imagery.... what the forms are? (??)
• Visually evocative of the 60s — the forms... also 90s with early net art, and degradation of the image. 
• Using 'incantation' deliberately, to frame speech, and thus, the speaker (user) as a witch, in this context? interesting approach..? Might be established first in the setup space — get them to speak along with it? Be more explicit in how you are constructing the user as a performer(?) in the theatre. 
• The camera feed could be really key in affording speech — seeing yourself there
  

Critique of critique

• I think the cyborg-witch materiality, and ontology is really coming through, I was not concerned about that so much but it's good to see that the conceptual groundwork is really strong. 

• The positive reaction to the webcam feed was surprising. I haven't thought that much about it, but I should be. How might I make it more embedded in the scene and look more deliberate?
  
  I think Jacqueline's points about the visual style are important to keep in mind. More research into theatre spaces and setups would be good here to, again, make sure these choices are deliberate. Also to work out why the images are getting cut off, and if I should fix that or work the imagery around it. To experiment and iterate, be a little looser with the "template"
  
  
• Mike's questions about the space and the audience are really important, and I'm struggling to make sense of who this is for, who it isn't, and how I design to that. Who gets to play on the stage. I think the interactions are the most compelling aspect of this, being able to play and see yourself occupying / embodying a cyborg-witch way of being. But what does it mean when a white man (?) "stands" on that stage, and speaks those words? Because I can set out to make this for a really specific audience who occupy similar intersections to me, but other people are going to enter it, and realistically, more people who are not LGBT+/Chinese/Chinese-Australian/women are going to experience it than not. 
  
  Gender/race/sexual identity aside, I think it is for everyone who has access to the internet, and a webcam and microphone. I'm not acknowledging all identity categories e.g. able-bodiedness/disability but should I so that it's not ignored? 
  
  I don't know if this, as the audience is too broad? I don't know how to reconcile the differences in identity and representation, but then asking the audience/putting them in a position of occupying a space that isn't theirs. Doing a project about representation but having, potentially, other people occupying the space. 

Action list:

• iterate ways to get people to speak
• user map the experience out
• start thinking/researching visual styles/precedents to make sure the design is where you want it to be.